Comments on: Toni’s Story http://www.beenthereclearinghouse.com/2005/09/28/tonis-story/ Fri, 21 Nov 2008 19:07:05 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=1.6-ALPHA-2-still-dont-use by: zoe hare http://www.beenthereclearinghouse.com/2005/09/28/tonis-story/#comment-3675 Sun, 08 Jan 2006 08:00:19 +0000 http://www.beenthereclearinghouse.com/2005/09/28/tonis-story/#comment-3675 Thanks Toni for your story. ( SANDI--If you would like to share your family's experiences with me please contact zoehare@msn.com). I was just in N.O. working on a book project documenting people's experiences of the storm. I am talking to a wide variety of people in the city and surrounding areas with idea of reflecting a real picture of teh storm, the deluge and the continuing tragedy, as folks attempt to re-build their lives. I will return again this later this month to continue interviewing people and taking pictures. Stories like yours are hard to comprehend by someone like me who was safe and dry in San Francisco when Katrina and Rita came to visit the Gulf Coast. My two little boys have never known suffering beyond being required to finish their broccoli before they can have a cookie. Without having lived it, one will never know. In California several years ago thousands of middle and upper middle-class folks lost everything in the Oakland/Berkrly Hills fires. Wildfires are the annual counterpart to your hurricanes, I suppose, but it's the same thing no matter where you are or the nature of the disaster--The terrible and raw power of stories of loss and survival move us to listen, to hear deeply. There is nothing more compelling than tales of suffering. Because we cannot truly feel another's pain, and because we cannot help but desire to, we strain to enter the reality which the story unfolds--there is a sensation of stretching, straining ourselves to enter the feeling of the sufferer. So as we seem to find ourselves largely protected from truly knowing another's pain by the refuge of our individual subjectivity, our humanity, our fellow-feeling non-the-less compels us toward compassion, and empathy.... This is the thing that matters. Because w/o empathy compassion cannot grow, and w/o compassion, our humanity is lost. You and your family have my prayers. Zoe Hare Thanks Toni for your story. ( SANDI–If you would like to share your family’s experiences with me please contact zoehare@msn.com). I was just in N.O. working on a book project documenting people’s experiences of the storm. I am talking to a wide variety of people in the city and surrounding areas with idea of reflecting a real picture of teh storm, the deluge and the continuing tragedy, as folks attempt to re-build their lives. I will return again this later this month to continue interviewing people and taking pictures. Stories like yours are hard to comprehend by someone like me who was safe and dry in San Francisco when Katrina and Rita came to visit the Gulf Coast. My two little boys have never known suffering beyond being required to finish their broccoli before they can have a cookie. Without having lived it, one will never know. In California several years ago thousands of middle and upper middle-class folks lost everything in the Oakland/Berkrly Hills fires. Wildfires are the annual counterpart to your hurricanes, I suppose, but it’s the same thing no matter where you are or the nature of the disaster–The terrible and raw power of stories of loss and survival move us to listen, to hear deeply. There is nothing more compelling than tales of suffering. Because we cannot truly feel another’s pain, and because we cannot help but desire to, we strain to enter the reality which the story unfolds–there is a sensation of stretching, straining ourselves to enter the feeling of the sufferer. So as we seem to find ourselves largely protected from truly knowing another’s pain by the refuge of our individual subjectivity, our humanity, our fellow-feeling non-the-less compels us toward compassion, and empathy…. This is the thing that matters. Because w/o empathy compassion cannot grow, and w/o compassion, our humanity is lost.
You and your family have my prayers. Zoe Hare

]]> by: Sandi http://www.beenthereclearinghouse.com/2005/09/28/tonis-story/#comment-3500 Thu, 03 Nov 2005 20:37:18 +0000 http://www.beenthereclearinghouse.com/2005/09/28/tonis-story/#comment-3500 Toni, I stumbled across your story while searching for a picture that's been burned in my mind for a couple months (at least since the storm). I didn't find the picture, however I found the means to envision what I was looking for. You see, I am also from the Coast. Although 10 years older than yourself, I find myself in a very similar situation. While you are apparently on one end of Biloxi, I am on the other side. The side somewhat spared, I guess you could say. My mother has been left with a slab, like many others, and somehow or another these people are thankful for having "that much." I truly don't know how we will all keep it together. For me, it seems everyday is a struggle. My three children don't seem to understand. My husband is from up north and his family seems to deem our "treasures" as "just stuff" and we should all just get over it. It's times like this that I wish I could just have my "stuff" back for a moment. I hope you and your family are well and things are on the up and up. Toni, I stumbled across your story while searching for a picture that’s been burned in my mind for a couple months (at least since the storm). I didn’t find the picture, however I found the means to envision what I was looking for. You see, I am also from the Coast. Although 10 years older than yourself, I find myself in a very similar situation. While you are apparently on one end of Biloxi, I am on the other side. The side somewhat spared, I guess you could say. My mother has been left with a slab, like many others, and somehow or another these people are thankful for having “that much.” I truly don’t know how we will all keep it together. For me, it seems everyday is a struggle. My three children don’t seem to understand. My husband is from up north and his family seems to deem our “treasures” as “just stuff” and we should all just get over it. It’s times like this that I wish I could just have my “stuff” back for a moment.

I hope you and your family are well and things are on the up and up.

]]> by: Suzen http://www.beenthereclearinghouse.com/2005/09/28/tonis-story/#comment-3492 Sat, 29 Oct 2005 18:34:40 +0000 http://www.beenthereclearinghouse.com/2005/09/28/tonis-story/#comment-3492 Tony sorry I called you Sharon but I am just learning your name. So TONY YOU are amazing.. Tony sorry I called you Sharon but I am just learning your name. So TONY YOU are amazing..

]]> by: Suzen http://www.beenthereclearinghouse.com/2005/09/28/tonis-story/#comment-3491 Sat, 29 Oct 2005 18:32:58 +0000 http://www.beenthereclearinghouse.com/2005/09/28/tonis-story/#comment-3491 WOW Sharon You are amazing. If I am ever caught complaining about my life could someone just kick me hard.... I love you and I dont know you but if you need anything please just ask. Suzen WOW Sharon You are amazing. If I am ever caught complaining about my life could someone just kick me hard…. I love you and I dont know you but if you need anything please just ask. Suzen

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